Being Emapthic towards Others

I love the fact that I did a podcast on this topic a few days ago, but sitting and seeing this title sitting in my draft queue means that I HAVE to write about it (well I don’t have to, but I know not everyone listens to the podcasts, which I understand). I had a conversation with a friend of mine, & it was brought to my attention how much I care for who and what others want while leaving myself with next to nothing(10 Traits Empathic People Share). In doing this, I was facing a harsh reality, & that is that you give a lot of you & sometimes feel like you have nothing to show for it. Then, there’s this mere reality that I realized. After reading the article that my twin shared with me (refer above), I needed to remember and realize that BT matters. I have been willing to admit that taking the BT trip a few weeks ago was a huge blessing in the making. The reason being is that it taught me how to re-tool various pieces of my life. OK, Bryan, you mind breaking that down for us? Of course not. Being a kind and giving person is something I will NEVER stop doing. That being said, don’t take my kindness for weakness. Most of all, take into consideration that it isn’t personal if I don’t decide to help you with what you’re seeking  & I haven’t completed or worked on something for myself while leaving myself nothing. It’s almost like helping someone in school with a homework assignment & you haven’t even finished the assignment you’re currently working on to help them with something they learned right along with you. It’s not that you don’t wanna see the person succeed, but you have to teach the person the one thing that you have more of than you realize from being around the right people in the right environment…PATIENCE!!! Teaching patience to others is scary sometimes. I think that patience is practically a gift and a curse. A lot of times, people don’t know how to handle my patience, because the truth is that I don’t have a rush of going anywhere. A lot of times, we’re not all going to the same place. However, me running everyone off the road to get nowhere isn’t gonna get me to my location any faster. What good is it to get to work 20 minutes early just to sit there because I won “the race” that I didn’t even know I was racing to begin with. A few years ago, I dated someone who had to get everywhere fast to make herself feel like she accomplished. In reality, she didn’t achieve anything. You couldn’t tell her that though. Yeah, random story time. Sorry. That being said, it’s like we get mad with things going on around us failing to realize that we have no control over those things. We have control over ourselves, & even those variables of control can have a tendency to slip out of our hands. I think we forget that sometimes. Three of the most challenging people (in my opinion) are control freaks, perfectionists, & victims. We all want control of every single thing we’re not meant to have control of in the first place realizing that having that form of control causes stress, anxiety, & frustration (sorry sis). Then there are those who want everything in life to be perfect. Find the perfect parking space, get on the elevator with the perfect people who won’t bother us in our morning travel to our job, & have the perfect playlist playing on our perfect phone that we don’t even like because of the imperfect plan that we paid for with a pair of generic headphones that we feel we shouldn’t own because our normal pair we wear either got messed up in the washing machine or were left at home. And before you say it, yes I know that was a run-on sentence. The victims are gonna sometimes be known as the woe-is-me I’m having a rough time with life & it’s literally the Eeyore mentally of everything being rough and unenjoyable with life and all that it supposedly brings. We all know someone who is ALWAYS going through something. We all know someone who is ALWAYS happy. Many people who know me know that I won’t seem like everything is great all the time, but that doesn’t mean that I wanna pour my soul out to you about how life is coming or going for me. I think sometimes I scare people with that. I wouldn’t change it for the world though. The one harsh reality that I see is that in no way shape or form do I expect or accept any pity for what life has in front of me. The heaviest & hardest challenge is that life is gonna be hard, but it’s how you push to simplify your life.

Oh nooooooo (Mr. Bill reference). I feel like a bad writer, because I had a pretty nice title lined up to talk about, & I’ve made it my goal to talk about everything in the realm of the conversation, but needed to return back to it. I’ve been way to empathic and caring for everyone else. Thankfully, I have realized that I can care about everyone else & their feelings, but that doesn’t mean that I leave myself a small piece. That was the issue & what I was doing wrong. Me turning off being a good person and giving someone a ride or helping someone financially won’t happen. The most important piece of the puzzle is to be true to me & just make sure that I don’t hurt or harm myself by all means. Life will teach you lessons & individuals will share information with you (even when your’e not willing to accept or hear it). Sometimes, our true colors shine through others who are trying to help us see the shining. I’m gonna leave you & close with a true message. If someone is stopping your shining, then it’s time to let go of someone for your mental and emotional strength. Being angered by the antics that are usually out of your control won’t change the pieces of the pie that you have yet to eat, because eventually you will be hungry & ready to gain that worthwhile control. That’s my closing message & I hope that you hung around this long with this blog, because I really wanted to share my thoughts about how I Feel about what life has been bringing. I hope everyone has a blessed & positive week. Until next time, this is BT signing out. Peace.

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